t h e b e g i n n i n g

in the beginning, there was darkness

a darkness so potent and so deep

that there was no escaping

there was no air to breathe

it was suffocating

and lonely

how will I survive this?

can I survive this?

am I even alive at all?

what is living

if there's such a weight on my chest

that I cannot take

a single breath

but if i’m having these thoughts

and I can scream inside

what if it’s not my body

that needs to die

something else exists

something is here with me

these thoughts I’m having

this voice in the deep

“the beginning”

8/11/23

t h e h e r w i t h i n m e

who is she

that calls to me

in the middle of the night

in the midst of my dreams

that voice I hear

the songs she sings

asking me to consider

what if she was there all along

and I just wasn’t listening

wasn’t looking

wasn’t strong enough

but she was always there

patient and kind

in the back of my mind

waiting 

for the day that i

would finally

finally

set her free

“The Her Within Me”

9/18/21

d e e p e n i n g

there is only one thing missing

to my surprise

all is present within us

and yet

there is only one thing missing

something secret

in hiding or waiting

or changing, becoming

something different

something wild

unspoken

and though i can’t quite place it

all that it is

it calls to me

so i know

it exists

and it’s deepening

shall we chase it?

“deepening”

3/13/2021

w i n g s

my past was a boulder

weighing me down

so I held it up, said goodbye

watched it melt to the ground

and as I saw it fade

it became rich as the soil

I rooted into the earth

and felt my wings uncoil

from the tangled-up mess

of years without use

I pulled my strength into my body

I shook them loose

and I imagined them lifting me

higher and higher and higher off the ground

I said I know you are sore but please

never let me down

I belong in the sky

and I

cannot return

they said,

my friend,

you have done

so

much

and now,

it’s our turn

"wings"

2021